North Korea, Best Korea!
I just went in my fridge and said to my turkey "see you thursday". I seriously have issues
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
i'm going as a slutty football player, and all night i'll drunkily whisper "id love to catch your balls." into random strangers ears.
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
Earlier today I was eating cookie dough from a tube, now I'm laying naked next to a hot guy watching Pawn Stars in between orgasms. You really can have it all.
You WHAT?!?!
Paid. A. Homeless. Guy. To. Throw. A. Drink. In. Her. Face.
I fucking love you.
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
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