Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
Point in my hangover when I'm honestly not sure if I'm about to puke, or shit my pants.
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
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