Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
your ex dropped by. you can call me dwight howard, cuz im the king of rebounds
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
you told the cab driver to stop being such a pussy because he wouldn't let you shotgun a beer in the backseat
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
I am drunk. Riding an elevator. You can smell the beer. Doctor on with me just smiling at me... He agrees, fuck cancer.
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
Randomize
