Cold hands, warm shart.
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
How do you make a Facebook status saying how much you fucking hate yourself without being aggressive enough for people to worry about your safety
Cuz that's where I'm at
Randomize
