Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
Just realized my relationship wasn't even Facebook official and I'd already cheated on him. 'Shitty girlfriend' is an understatement.
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
This will always be remembered as the Christmas I had 15 Russians sing christmas carols to me at 130am alone in a gas station while I was stoned on pot brownies
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
Randomize
