i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
Bring me that man meat
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
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