I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
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