I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?
Fuck you, my tits are fabulous
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
How drunk is too drunk to be on an airplane?
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
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