he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
Just saw 3 10-year olds in business suits drinking iced coffees at the cafe. I'm officially a failure if these kids have jobs and I don't.
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
Ugh he's texting me.
Tell him you're no longer interested in what he has to offer; his shitty personality outweighs his sexual prowess.
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
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