I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
Ordered weed last night from the delivery service, and who showed up...my old real estate broker. He said, "this is less stressful." Duh.
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
just found a bag of Oreos in my purse labeled "emergency".
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
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