Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
This year I'm going to try NOT getting arrested. I think the 30th birthday is the cutoff for calling Mom to bail me out.
During breaking dawn, he leaned over and asked me why she would have to worry about her period since she essentially just married a walking super-absorbant tampon... It was the best way to ruin those movies for me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
I swear to God, if you drunkenly correct my grammar one more time, I'm cutting you off.
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i ended up making out with my new neighbor in a stranger's car that we found unlocked on a driveway somewhere. apparently drunk self never say "no" to adventure.
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
My life has come down to me literally sitting on an uncrustables trying to defrost it because I’m drunk alone and hungry.
i need you to come over and tell me if you can notice that i'm only wearing a teddy underneath my trenchcoat
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