We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
There r osticjed everywhere
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
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