I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
I'm going to rape someone's good day.
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
I've also decided that the true test of whether or not you should marry a girl is if she will willingly blow you while you eat Oreos.
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
Randomize
