At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
My balls are so social today.
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
Randomize
