god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
The doctor asked me what height I fell from to hurt my back.. I answered keg height
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You yell at me for giving you beer but not for licking spilled beer off your chest.
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
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