How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
I was so drunk last night i ate cereal with a fork.
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
It's alarming how good I'm getting at being productive at work on Thursday after Johnny Walker Wednesdays.
just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
Don't make this awkward for me. Don't let your mom come near the bathroom. I can't meet your mom for the first time while I'm shitting. Dont make this awkward.
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
Xanax and an ambien. And wine. I'm just waiting for mouth to mouth from some hot EMT. Sort of like the slutty girls version of sleeping beauty
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
Randomize
