Is it normal to miss your booty call?
Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
Had mirculous sex while watching miracle. Until she got mad that I kept quoting the movie. Not my fault I'm a good multi-tasker
Do you believe in miracles?
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
Randomize
