Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
The girl beside me at the laundromat is bitching a guy out on the phone for jizzing on her bedspread. She had to use a triple machine to wash it.
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
Randomize