My grandmass entire neighborhood is over for dessert and i'm high as fuck...about to make a couple of freshman boys real uncomfortable
Freshman in high school? Just your type
Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
My Mom bought me a vibrating toothbrush. Maybe this is her way of apologizing for throwing away my other thing that vibrated.
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
You know that you're in a bad spot when the doctor puts you on 500mg of amoxicillin 4 times a day for ten days and puts refills on it...
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
Randomize
