are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
I just saw a man vacuming his front lawn. What is this world coming to?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
Its really bad when you fall asleep at a stop light outside the hotel and you wake up to a small spanish limo driver knocking on your window to tell you it's a green light
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
I think I'm leaving the streamers and balloons up from 4th of july till after he stops by. It'll be like the universe is celebrating his massive dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
are you still alive?
no.
i'll cry at your funeral. and leave a burrito by your tombstone
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
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