Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
Yeah we were on bar number 7 on our bike trail and you decided to steal my bike and we found you 20 minutes later eating Cheetos in the shallow end of your parents pool
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
Randomize
