Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
So I'm looking through your google history on your laptop and you have 'is ketchup even remotely nutritious' and 'alcohol with fewest calories but highest alcohol'. What new fad diet are you on because I feel like we could do this together.
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.
I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
Omg. I definitely just got hit on by my doctor AFTER he completed my pap smear which clearly showed I was in the middle of an outbreak. What. The. Fuck.
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
Randomize
