I hate all girls vehemently.
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
What are you doing tomorrow?
Dude its my bday. Im drinking from sunup til face down. Rinse and repeat.
Randomize