Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
Alright, text me when you get close. I've got a mustache and I'm ready to get my day drunk on.
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
I need a beard to bite.
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
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