dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
I think I'm destined to be the stoner version of one of those successful but emotionally unavailable characters Sandra Bullock always plays in movies
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
If I had your ass I would rule the world
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
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