I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
the chips you spilled whiskey on is not the same thing as Irish breakfast potatoes
I just need to drink whiskey get off and eat some cheese. Why is that so fucking hard for god to deliver.
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
Dude in the stall next to me shitting and sobbing. Dude another stall over, "Come on bro, you gotta loosen up." This is why I don't shit in public.
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
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