There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
i wanna have a kid now so by the time he's 20 ill only be 42 and assuming im already divorced we can pick up girls together
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize
