I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
I need you to do me a favor and hide my sword from me tonight. I'm planning on drinking my weight in vodka and I don't trust myself enough to not run through campus screaming "I AM SPARTA!" You'll be saving me a mugshot as well as saving some innocent girls from tears.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
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