just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
I never woulda thought that back in kindergarten playong kickball that'd i'd be 24 getting plastered in front of the white house and winning a kickball championship in a young adult drinking league
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
Me-World Problems: do I have my boyfriend come to my birthday party in drag, or is that too weird for the first time meeting literally any of my friends
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
Just so we're clear, drunk and naked is not appropriate attire for Thanksgiving. Do it this year and Grandma will ban you for life.
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