it hurts more in the daytime
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
Randomize
