when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
I'm eating tomato paste and drinking banana juice that is expired. Can we please get groceries tonight?
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
No more vodka shots for you. Last night you begged a man on your knees to sell you his beard. He had no beard.
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
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