Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
When you're high, you dance like an injured velociraptor.
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
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