apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
Confirm that you received these messages so that I know you feel the agony of my vagina. There is such a thing as "too many penises".
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
Randomize
