Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
I wish the guy in the stall next to me would stop moaning while taking a dump.
I wish you'd stop texting me from the toilet.
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