I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
I seriously just had to blow dry my thong.
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
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