i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
Hey I'm not sure why your jacket's covered in maple syrup but I just realized you didn't leave the house earlier wearing a jacket...
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
Randomize
