bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
I just had unprotected sex with a stranger. but i did him wearing nothing but my pearls. so its classy.
I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
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