No seriously, I have to sell the house because my wife found out I'm gay.
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
i just discovered how you can fold down the cardboard sleeve on a hot pocket. Life just got a whole lot easier.
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
He was taking the condom off and he turns to me and says, "You know how snakes can shed their skin?"
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
He managed to rip my nipple last night....