It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
my favorite homeless guy just told me I drive like Batman, achievement unlocked
Went to an open-bar law school party and puked in front of Justice Scalia. My legal career is now complete -- I literally got judged by a U.S. Supreme Court Justice. Can't get any higher than that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
I'm texting you the word "cockring" because I feel it hasn't been said enough throughout our friendship.
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
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