I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
I'm not kidding, he literally jumped in the red panda exhibit. I knew this was gonna be a good birthday.
You tried to lick the lightbulb and fell off of the chair onto my wife and gave her a concussion. Did i mention you were naked?
I just found out how I got home last night. The bartenders found me sitting in the brush peeing and called me a cab. Have you seen my underwear?
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
Randomize
