I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
It's great when the cashier at the liquor store asks "weren't you wearing those clothes yesterday"
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
Randomize
