Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
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