I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
My water bill is like twice the normal amount. I need a boyfriend.
Do I even want to know?
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
I just faked an interview like I fake a fucking orgasm. Wonder if these candidates can tell I'm a tired and hungover recruiter?
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
I just sneeze out a chunk of leftover pickle I threw up last night. dont you try and tell me your day is going worse
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
Randomize
