My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
Im covered in vodka and melted gummys. Fuck summer.
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
Me-World Problems: do I have my boyfriend come to my birthday party in drag, or is that too weird for the first time meeting literally any of my friends
Y'all let us switch shirts in the middle of 200 people....why did you let me get this drunk by noon?
Randomize
