I want to stick my p in your. b.
this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
I think I'm pregnant with his hipster baby. It keeps kicking my stomach to the beat of mgmt songs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
During my first week as an adjunct prof, I played a fiercely fought game of squash with a law student and we wound up having hot, sweaty, angry sex right on the floor of the court. She is either the best or worst thing to happen to my academic career. Will let you know.
Randomize