I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
since i spend so many of my nights sleeping on the bathroom floor i think im going to remove all toiletries from under my sink and replace them with a pillow and blanket.
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
someday i'll meet a man and who loves me as much as i love getting drunk and starting fires
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
Just woke up in a Price Chopper bathroom stall with a half eaten cake on the floor. Had to get a ride from the waitress I made out with. What happened to "Don't let me drink Tequila?"
I lied.
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
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