So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
3 2 1 whiskey
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
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