I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party?
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
He told me the hickey on the side if his neck was actually a "bruise" from hitting a bird on his motorcycle. I'm not sure what's more impressive, the fact people believed him due to the size of the mark or the fact you gave it to him.
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
Randomize
