i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
Just wanted to let you know that I always win at "whose ex is crazier" because of you.
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
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