Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
I'm sitting here in nothing but my panties, eating beef jerky and reese's for breakfast.Today is not the day to expect me to make sound life decisions.
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
Well you ended up trying to convince two Greek girls that you were Greek, but failed massively by shouting at them in Spanish, and then almost vomiting after taking way too much snuff. Maybe lay off the guinness next time?
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
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