I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
You HAVE to stop telling me about the shit you do drunk. I can't be both your brother AND your gay friend.
We didn't mean to put a petting zoo in the elevator.
Because I'm currently dying, lacking waffles, and vaguely convinced I'm an eagle
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
Randomize
